Apparently, I will suffer infinite pain for all eternity. (Never mind how time is measured outside the universe.) Maybe that is why some minor skin wounds don’t bother me any more. Why will I burn in hell for all eternity? I’m not completely sure yet, but I intend to find out. So far it seems it is because I believe Jesus had an X and a Y chromosome.
Thus far, I have only found one friend that was prepared to answer the “am I going to hell?” question directly, and I appreciate his honesty and forthrightness. (Then again, I haven’t asked that many people yet.) I hope to find some more friends with that perspective nearby, so that I can get to the bottom of the matter more quickly. Otherwise it will have to wait until I do my trip around South Africa. (That will be some time soonish, let me know if you’d like me to stop by. I’d love to hear your stories, concerns, perspectives, opinions, theology, metaphysics and questions.)
Anyway, I’m not particularly worried about hell any more. Why? Because I love Jesus and Jesus loves me, and for me, that is enough. I wonder if Jesus believed in his own virginal birth. If not, it would be pretty sweet to be able to hang out in hell and discuss the humour of the situation. (In between all the weeping and gnashing of teeth, of course.)
And yes guys and gals, please, this post is intended as humour.