I perceive a chasm between me and a large group of people I like to call friends. (Pedantically ponder the definition of “friendship”, and the implications of perceived chasms upon it?) It was part of what drained my energy: figuring out how to deal with this chasm, how to cross it, how to make it go away. While I feel I’ve “succeeded” in figuring it all out, I still perceive a chasm. I’m thinking it is probably just my perception, and I should get over it.

I read somewhere that teenagers often go through a phase where their group of friends changes from being focused more on what activities they have in common, to more about what philosophies and world-views they share. That is probably quite understandable? Though I seriously dislike the “cliquish” behaviour of some groups? Why though? I think because they cut themselves off from any other perspectives, and thereby give themselves no chance to learn, to broaden their horizons, etc. (Not referring to any of my friends here, I think – I’m more referring to groups that already exclude me for not being one of them, thus, friends: don’t try and squeeze your foot into this shoe, it doesn’t fit.)

I do notice that lately I have been socializing more often with friends that I know have compatible philosophies and world-views. That is of some concern to me, I feel I’m losing touch with other friends? Not because I want to, just because work pressure limits my time and energy to such an extent that I just don’t get around to them? The little time I do have, I need to be able to unwind properly, which does require having some understanding on philosophical matters, “deeper connections” if you will. Without that, there always seems to be the chasm… Again, maybe just my warped perception, but broaching the subject just seems too dangerous? For fear of it becoming yet another battle… or something. (So am I exhibiting typical teen behaviour, half way through my 20s?)

Blogging about friendships and relationships is extremely tricky (for what I assume are very obvious reasons). I’ve more of less given up on ideas that head in that direction. I hope this comment is well worded… I think it is. It feels a little safer hidden away in a comment (that isn’t imported into Facebook, for example). I wonder how many people actually read the comments, not many, I think.

I look forward to having the time and energy to re-establish contact, I’m somewhat concerned that some people have given up on me…